ppemberton

When Rolling Stone plastered R.E.M. on its cover, declaring them “America’s Best Rock & Roll Band” in 1987, I was like: “Aren’t these the guys who played at Jake’s just a few years ago?”

Jake’s was a college bar in Bloomington, Indiana, where I lived at the time. While John Mellencamp would occasionally surprise patrons at The Bluebird just down the road, Bloomington bars typically didn’t host big name acts, and R.E.M. was no exception.

When I saw R.E.M. on the marquee, circa 1983, I had no idea who they were.

Of course, that changed drastically, as R.E.M. would become rock royalty for a time.

Years later, when rock and roll needed another R.E.M., Coldplay stepped up and got huge. Like R.E.M., Coldplay was mimicked by garage bands across the world. And despite promising starts, both alternative rock bands are sadly past their prime.

I’m going to give this Grudge Match to R.E.M., but let me first say a few words about Coldplay:

The band’s first album, “Parachutes,” was excellent, lending hope that music was not, in fact, dead. Though the band’s work has been compared to Radiohead and U2, among others, it still had its own style, with effects-drenched guitar, lazy vocals and somber piano riffs. Even if you aren’t into meditating (or smoking weed, for that matter), if you listen to “Parachutes,” you find yourself in a trance.

It was an album that was good from front to end, yet most Americans hadn’t heard of Coldplay until “A Rush of Blood to the Head.” Soon after that was released, Coldplay got big – then ginormous.

And then they started to suck.

Their second album wasn’t as good as the first, and “X&Y” should have been named “Zzzzz.” Their latest – “La Vida Loca,” or whatever it’s called – just doesn’t excite me.

So Coldplay has roughly 1.6 good albums.

R.E.M. might not have had an album as good as “Parachutes,” but the fact is they had many more good songs than Coldplay. And I think they’re legacy will last longer. Back in the 80s, R.E.M. was the driving force behind alternative music that still thrives (once again underground, for the most part) today. Coldplay’s influence will be much shorter.

Oh – and did I mention that R.E.M. has a San Luis Obispo connection? Guitarist Peter Buck once lived in San Luis Obispo during the late 70s.

Danny

Pat’s trend of backing washed up has-been’s continues this week as he vainly tries to make a case for REM over Coldplay.  Now, I’m not going to argue that in their time REM were a great band, I mean End of the World As We Know It (and I Feel Fine) is a great song (despite only about 5 people worldwide knowing all the lyrics), and Automatic for the People is a superb album.  Here’s the thing though, everything they’ve done since Automatic sucks, and because of that, Coldplay have a significant advantage.

Here are my top eight reasons why Coldplay are better than REM:

1. Stand – seriously, that song sucks.
2. Gwyneth Paltrow seems to be a fan.
3. Shiny Happy People – a song that will bring out the mass murderer in anyone.
4. Coldplay are British, which makes them more awesome than if they were American.
5. Coldplay made a backwards music video, and for a great song.
6. Shiny Happy People.
7. Clocks and Talk are my five-year-old’s favourite songs, and you can’t argue with him.  I’ve tried, it doesn’t work.
8. Shiny Happy People.

So there you have it, eight conclusive reasons why Coldplay out-awesome REM.

I’ll admit that Coldplay’s most recent album was a bit of a disappointment, but there are a couple of good tracks on there.  The good news is they have the chance to redeem themselves, since they announced today that they’re planning to release a new EP in December.  It was really nice of them to time the announcement to match our Grudge Match.  Thanks guys.